I'm That Crazy Fish Woman!

I am the crazy fish lady.

I had one fish. One. His name was Chrono and he was an awesome fish. And yeah, I know that fish don't generally have a lot of personality, but he seriously did. He knew when I was about to feed him and would sort of swim to the surface and pounce on his little granules of food.

And then he died this past spring. He was old for a fish so it was understandable, but still very upsetting because, as it turns out, I don't deal well with death. I buried him outside in a great quiet place because I couldn't bring myself to flush him. In case you were wondering, his name was Chrono because he was blue with red tipped fins. Chrono, the character from Chrono Trigger, had red hair and wore blue. It all makes sense. Shuttup, I'm just as dorky as you are.

So, my brother, as I mentioned before, got me Voldemort (whose saga can be found here). Voldemort is an awesome fish, but I am pretty sure he is slightly evil. I know this because he swims upside down and STALKS his granules. Yes, stalks. He hides in his plants and slowly ventures towards the surface where he then POUNCES. It makes me glad that I am bigger than he is.

Why am I the fish lady, you ask? Well, okay, here goes. You may want to take a bathroom break before reading this- it may be a while.

The Baker Painter went off and got married. By went off and got married, I mean that she and The Canadian were engaged for a long time and then decided to do it somewhat last minute. Angry Squirrel and I were witnesses at the courthouse. And then The Beer Connoisseur and The New Girl (who isn't so much the new girl anymore...hmmm...) took them out to lunch to celebrate. As it turns out, The Baker Painter and The Canadian are now all kind of adventurous and are moving far away just because they can. They cannot, however, easily take their two beta fish with them. So, now I am babysitting them indefinitely, although The Baker Painter promised me that if one or both of them passes away and heads out to the great fish bowl in the sky, she will not be upset.

Now I have Stan, Yet-Wah, and Voldemort living in my room. All in different bowls because betas will kill each other if they are in the same bowl.

Part of me wants to dump them all in the same bowl and video tape the giant fish-style gladiator event, but I cannot emotionally stand there and watch them kill each other. I mean, I did actually cry when Chrono died so there is no way I'd let them kill each other.

Speaking of death and killing each other, is it weird that the primary ingredient in these beta granules is "fish meal" immediately followed by "fish oil?" Mmmmmm...Cannibal the Musical better watch out- I may have to write Beta Fish, the Musical Melodrama.