Secrets- EXPOSED!

We all have our secrets. In fact, I would go so far as to say that humans, by nature, are secretive creatures. Part of this, I'm sure, is because sometime in second grade we told the "cool" girl something embarrasing about ourselves in an attempt to become closer with her and she told the rest of the class, mocking us for the rest of the year about our teeny tiny crush on a kid named...shoot...what was his name? I want to say Ross, but I'm not completely sure. He had a really cool pencil case though. But anyway, the question is, which came first: the secrets or the pain?

I didn't realize how secretive I had become until a recent conversation with Miss Yankee who pointed out that I don't really let people touch my computer. Or my cell phone. Or my camera. Or anything that would give people any real glimpse into what my life is like. And after a couple of hiding porn jokes and a long stream of teasing, I thought about it. I really don't let people into my mundane, everyday life things. I mean, yeah, part of it is that my business is my business and I don't really want people reading text messages that could easily be taken out of context and thought of being something completely different. And while I don't really have much to hide in my computer's history, I don't want people asking me why I visited a site.

My real secrets, the things that really matter and are really important, are all things that I only trust with those who have proven themselves to me. And also, I have a decent amount of dirt on them as well. But something of dire importance has been bothering me lately. Something that I feel I should really post to get a good grip on reality.

So here it is.

I want a motorcycle.

That's right, you read correctly. I want a motorcycle. And not just that...I want to take a cross-country trip on said motorcycle. Armed only with enough clothing to get me through a very basic week, some basic necessities, a journal and a large novel. And possibly a camera, but that depends on how not-secretive I feel like being on this trip.

So everyone who knows me is probably thinking one of three things:
1) What? HESPER on a motorcycle? Can we say STITCHES?
2) Wow, I didn't expect this of her...it seems so random for Hesper.
3) This is a lousy secret. I kept reading for some real dirt and all I got was a confession about a motorcycle. I'm going to go see if she changed anything on her myspace profile.

So the idea would basically be to leave with enough money to get me to California and back in terms of gas and food, but I'd have to find temporary odd jobs to find places to sleep. Sort of a test in both my ability to be completely independant and completely on my own with a ton of unknowns and possibilities. And also, I would look amazingly cool on a motorcycle. Clearly, I've given this a lot of thought. I have my cute black leather jacket already picked out.

But in all seriousness, I really would like to do something crazy spontaneous like that. It doesn't have to be a long-drawn out cross-country trip, but maybe just a weekend where I just drive without any plans or directions and just see what happens.

So I guess my real secret is that I'm going to try to be more spontaneous and less anal about everything. Ok, no, that's a lie. I do really want a motorcycle. And not just for the cute jacket.